It’s a small world after all January 16, 2008

I think that some of these might be telling me to take myself out of the meat market. Or maybe I should spend some time on the disabled list.

• Was approached last week by a guy that turned out to be the twin brother of a someone I dated last fall (in my defense, last week’s brother is a good 50 pounds lighter and they aren’t identical). Talk about awkward.
• I got stood up. On a weekend night. This is why I normally schedule first dates for a weeknight.
• Some guys apparently think it proper dating technique to make proposals for sex during their first conversation with me. This week, it includes:
  • “hello i like ur profile when can i tap that sexy ass of yours.”
  • “even though i can’t see it in ur pic, i can tell u have a great ass” (Sure, I do, but how does this guy know it? Is there some other anatomy rule like the one about your foot being the length of the inside of your arm?)
  • “can i get me somma that ass?”
  • “i wanna be naughty with you” (I have feeling he didn’t mean attempting to bribe someone into kitchenering your mitten tops - I am guilty of that.)
• And from someone that I had been talking to for a while, an offer for a threesome with two guys, since he just wants to make me happy. Sure, it’s sweet that he’s thinking of me, but I just didn’t know what to say. Uh, thanks?
• When I told a 44-year-old (he’s the same age as my step-dad) I wasn’t interested in dating, he replied that was fine, but he could give me “maybe a nice warm hug from time to tiem[sic] cause i do love to give those.” Come on. We all know Ari is the only one who wants to “hug it out. I’m such the E.
• And a plethora of misunderstandings due to either sarcasm or using 7-letter, high point value words in daily conversation. For example:
  • Not-so-bright-guy: what you up to tonight
  • me: just got home from a massage - heading to bed soon. how about you?
  • nsbg: togoing [sic - just keeping it real] to bed soon too. No massage. Could use one.
  • me: if that’s a thinly veiled innuendo, i’m not biting - it’s a little too early for that!
  • nsbg: huh ok, you just lost me. next subject

On how I’m not a good writer… January 15, 2008

Julia is. I struggle to explain my fibro to many of you who ask, and she captures it. We’ve not always shared the same treatment journey (not really treating, but coping), but right now…

Oddly enough, this week I’m supposed to be detoxing on Elavil for similar reasons, but I decided after today’s unrelenting headache it just isn’t worth it. Last week, I was the ice’s bitch three times in the same day and visited a new rheumatologist who is bat-shit crazy. That’s enough for me. I’ll try again next week.

[ETA: I'm not saying in any way my pain is as severe or lasting as she's experienced.  Just that I'm trying to get off a drug that I've been on for a decade, that's all.]

Things I’ve learned January 2, 2008

In a particular order, some of the things I’ve learned today:

1.  The thermometer in my vehicle does, in fact, register negative Fahrenheit temperatures.

2.  Despite my numerous assurances to the contrary, the Twin Cities do accumulate ice on some paved surfaces.

3.  It is too damn cold to be icing my knee.  (And with that, I have officially broken my New Year’s resolution to stop cursing - though, to be accurate, I probably broke it earlier in the day.)